Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
