I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Actions speak louder than pants.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
