If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
