a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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