Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
She just used a chaser for red wine.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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