it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch