i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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