**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
