Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
