you would pick up someone in the library
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
