I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I want you more than these girls want KFC
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
