Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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