we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
