I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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