Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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