I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize