So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
