Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
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