Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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