Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Houston, we have a squirter
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's gonorrhea incarnate
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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