I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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