Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize