I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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