Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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