Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
