what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
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If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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