Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize