awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
