my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize