my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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