Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
