I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??