Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s