The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
