talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
