Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
what food is Colorado known for?