even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
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