I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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