East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize