But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
