is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
We named our party play list daddy issues
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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