This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
