I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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