i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i think my mom watched the whole time
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
40s are totally the cure
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....