Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
cat food counts as protein by the way
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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