Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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