why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
