Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize