just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Alive.
So much puke
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
