I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
