Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize